January 6th, 2003



I expected it... and here it is...

Welcome to another installment of ..

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a favor

if I asked you to kill me...
would you?
could you?

could you really stare lovingly into my eyes as the axe fell?
could you be there holding my hand tenderly as you sawed through my wrist?
would you kiss me sweetly as the dagger ripped through my flesh?

I want the pain, I need it
to know I'm alive
to feel before dying

perhaps you'd just wink and smile before pulling the trigger
maybe you'd pet my hair as you tightened the noose
if only you'd snuggle up to me on the rack

so what do you say?
can you?
will you?


worked today, for the first time in a few weeks. It wasn't too bad, really. I had enough to do, so I kept busy. Went to Chinese for lunch by myself, then Rodimus came in just as I was leaving. Had a kinda tight schedule, so couldn't stay.

Came home to eat, then crashed... Still groggy atm. Cirque behind the scenes series is coming up soon, I'll prolly watch it.

Think it's about time for my 4th meal of the day... *sigh*

I think I've got a touch of something for sure now... Partly why I've been down/sleeping.
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